Parent Advice

At times, parents offer parenting advice as though it were scripture.

Sometimes, you think your venting to like minds, and the scripture bleeds into the conversation making you feel like you did something wrong. Even when you didn't.

You say your son is picky.

"Your child should eat whatever is on that table."

You say that your son wakes up frequently during the night.

"You need to sleep train your child."

My son hits.

"I would never let my child get away with that."

"Hit him back. He'll learn."

"Time out."

It make sense. We all need some sort of scripture to justify our decisions. 

I'm still not at a point where I'm comfortable (yet) with retorting with my son has autism like it's a weapon against those scriptures. 

"My son gags because he has food sensitivities."

"My son doesn't sleep because he is a sensory seeker."

"My son hits as a form of language substitution. He doesn't have the words, so he uses his body. When he is sad, scared, frustrated."

I'm still working on being graceful in those conversations.

It's hard to explain to people that not one scripture works for everybody.

But when someone asks me for parenting advice, I hope, I hope I catch myself and start with 

"What does your gut say?"

"What does your child seem to be communicating to you in those moments."

April 17 , 2016 (originally posted to Facebook)